Tired Boy

I’ve been in a consuming phase for a few months now – since I moved, really. By this I mean I find it hard to stop myself eating and drinking more than I actually need. I’m snacking quite a lot, and have put on weight. I think this shows I’m not 100% settled in to my new home – I see it as a sign of being not quite comfortable – and also of boredom – as I am spending the majority of my time in one room, it’s a distraction activity. I am slowly increasing the amount of time I spend out of the house, and the weather is starting to perk up as Spring comes on, and I think this combination, along with slowly getting to know more people in the area and having more of a social life, will help me to cut down this consumption. I have put on a fair amount of weight and am not feeling great about my body at the moment. I am really keen to get back on the restrictive diet I’ve talked about before, but the combination of the effort required plus a lack of willpower at the moment is making this difficult to contemplate!

I’ve written before about how I’ve found it easier to perform creative tasks than analytical ones, and about how being creative, when I’m able to do it, can lift both my spirit and my health state.

I’ve just started reading a book by Stephen Fry, called The Ode Less Travelled (a bad pun, I know), which is about poetry, and particularly the fact that many people feel intimidated from trying it by its seeming complexity. I’ve been surprised by just how much the first chapters have inspired me to start trying my hand once more at writing some poetry. It’s something I should always have been into, as both language and beauty are so important to me, but I have always felt an unease about trying. Part of this is the fear of failure – of having to write lots of bad poetry as practice for (hopefully) eventually writing some good stuff – but also because of the feeling that I simply don’t know what makes a good or a bad poem. I wrote a couple of poems several years ago, which were written more or less on instinct. A couple of poet friends said some nice things about them, but I really didn’t know what it was which made some parts work, and others not work. This book breaks down the structure of poetry to demystify all this, and I’m finding it a great help and inspiration to get writing again. I’ve also found the first few exercises (writing lines about anything at all in iambic pentameter – and I’ve discovered what that is, into the bargain) far more enjoyable, and less difficult, than I would have expected.

Given that my energy and strength are limited, writing poetry is something that should fit really well within my capabilities, more so than many other creative pursuits which require more activity, eg painting, playing a musical instrument, and so on. I‘m excited!